Weighnesday

Well, my weight didn't change this week.  I contribute this to not moving my butt and eating a couple of treats.  ugh  I know I am at the beginning of this journey and in the healing stage, so I am trying to not beat myself up too badly.
I may be only 3 weeks out, but I am seeing the mental part of this.  I didn't get this way just because I like the taste of food, but because food became my best friend when I was going thru some tough times.  I am working on shifting that relationship.

My husband surprised me with a Wii for Christmas.  He knew how badly I wanted one and was able to get one from a friend. (his daughter just wasn't into it).  He got me the Dance workout which is awesome so far because it has several "games" on it...boxing, jumping rope and sword fighting.  :)  I am still on limits of what I can do, so I am going into this slowly.  Loving it so far though.

I pray everyone has a Happy and safe New Year!

Happy Weighnesday

Last weeks weight 232.8

This mornings 230.8

2 more pounds down.  I am quite pleased.  Almost out of the 230's.

Well, I went Monday for my post-op visit.  I saw the PA and she was pleased with how everything is looking.  I go back Jan. 6th and they will do blood work.

I went to the nutritionist yesterday and I have been oked to advance to fork tender meats.  I am a little nervous.  I did learn that some of the things I had been counting as protein don't really count and that I need to lay off the carbs.  This will be easier since I can introduce fork tender meats.  She said I need to limit it to 2-3 oz of meat and 1/4-1/3 cup of veggies per meal.  Whew, my old self is struggling with the "fill my plate up" mode.  Gonna pull my new little plates out so I don't feel like I am eating such a small amount.

I want to do this right, so I am gonna do exactly what she says.  I found myself fearful yesterday.  The whole "am I gonna screw this up too" thoughts.  I know these thoughts are normal, so I am just processing them.  These thoughts will be a thing of the past after I have lost several pounds.

Happy Weighnesday

Good morning all.  Well, I am back on track on my official weigh day.

Drum roll please. (I used the litter drummer boy because that is my favorite Christmas song)
Total today is 232.8 for a loss of 5.6.  YEAH!!!

4 days post-0p

Happy Monday dear friends.  Thank you so much for all the kind words and prayers.
I am doing well.  The main pain I have had (besides some gas of course) is some back pain yesterday.  I think I was being so extra cautious getting up and down that I put too much pressure on my back.  lol, only me!!!

Well, my husband is a mess and I had to share.  The quality isn't great, but you get the point.  After surgery, I got sick, so they gave me some meds that made me sleepy.  When I got home, I sat in the recliner and went right to sleep.  My husband took full advantage of the moment and put an elf hat on my head and snapped a picture of me, sent it to several people and titled it Drunk Elf.  Whew, what am I gonna do with him.....get him back, that's what!  :)

I am now a band-it

I made it!!! Had a episode of vomiting in the hospital, but we got that under control. i was able to come home the same day. :) Just been resting and moving this gas around. ugh! not too sore, not sure how tomarrow will be. been working on getting the protein in.

Banding Eve and Weighdnesday

Well, it is my banding eve!!!  And I am excited, nervous, scared, excited, and a million other feelings!!!  whew....breathe!!!!

It has been a long 6 months, but today is flying by.  ha ha, leave it to me to be backwards.

I am very ready for this.  I weighed this morning and it was down to 238.4.  Not sure how it is gonna go the next 4 weeks because I have seen others gain or loss since the goal is the heal.  I already have my next two appts scheduled with the nutritionist.  I just have to pick up a few items on the way home and then I am ready.

No, I haven't fallen off the face of the earth.

Good morning all my banster friends.  First, wow, less then a week to go and I will join the ranks.  So excited/nervous.

Well, I have been awol for a couple of weeks.  Life got pretty difficult and it was all I could do to go thru the normal daily life.  I was tempted numerous time to eat things I should not (like milk shakes), but I didn't want to screw up all my hard work on my pre-op diet, so I fought thru the emotions.  First, my husband was going thru some very difficult, emotional troubles with his daughter.  Praise God though, He has been working on my husband and has more peace (because his wifey has prayed non-stop for him).  Then, the night before Thanksgiving, we had to rush my kitty to the animal hospital and I ultimately had to have her put to sleep.  My heart has been broken in a million pieces.  I am working thru it, but I miss her so much.  whew!!!

ok, on to band news. I had my pre-op visit 2 weeks ago.  Wow, were they ever thorough!!!  I have a friend that got banded several years ago at a different place and was not educated one bit!!  I have learned volumes more from the facility.  I love the place where I am getting my band.  The entire staff are amazing.

I have all my vitamins, shakes and mushi foods lined up and ready.  I am working on getting my bags packed for the hospital.  It works out my son's college semester ends on Dec. 7th, so I said he will be my nurse.  ha ha, he wasn't too thrilled with that.  I said, well, I will mostly want you to watch movies with me.  I have a pile of Christmas movies lined up and I bought a new book.  Yeah!!!!

So I am back and thankful to all mighty God for sending His grace and peace over my house hold.  I pray all of you, my bandster friends, are well.

Weighdnesday :)

Today's weight is 240.2.  Lose of 3.6 for this week.  I'll take it.  :)

Feel a huge sense of relief now that I have the approval and a date.  Thank you so much to all of you for sharing my excitement and cheering me on.  I am amazed and inspired by all of you.

We have a date!!!!!

Desiree (my future band) will be born Dec. 8th.  WOO HOO!!!!!  I go in two weeks for some blood work.  Looks like I will be eating Turkey, creamed cauliflower and hoping to find a low carb pumkin pudding/cheese cake/pie for Thanksgiving.  :)

Thank you so much to EVERYONE for all your well wishes and inspiration.

Anniversary, cake and facing realities

WARNING!!!  Food Porn!

Today is our first Anniversary!!!  Yeah!!!  One of the best things I have ever done.  :)  This time last year was such an exciting day.  We are both the babies of large families and most of our siblings were there.  He has a daughter and I have a son and they both are such a part of us that we had them in the wedding.  They also lite the unity candles (both our parents are already passed on) and signed as our witnesses (they both were 18 at the time).  It was amazing to have our families a part of this day.  When his family met me, and mine met him, they allll knew this was right and were so ready for us to get married.  We dated for almost 3 yrs before getting married.  We both have been thru some tough times in previous relationships and we try to use what we learned to make this one right.  Anyhow, that day was right in a million ways.

Now, on to the cake.  My sister always enjoyed making cakes, but unfortunately arthritis has made it so she cannot do it anymore.  But with my wedding, she wanted to do it for me.  Awww.  As you can see, it is BEAUTIFUL!!!  I have always LOVED the basket weave and I love how she did the colors.  As tradition holds, we saved the top of our cake....but guess what, I can't eat it...not yet.  I am still on the 40 carbs or less pre-op and I don't want to screw it up for ANYTHING.  So I told hubby that we will have some cake after surgery when I am on solids.  This way I can have my cake and eat it too.  (I know, I am so punny)
My new hubby is very country and some would even say REDNECK.  I am a country girl, so we are perfect together.  I searched high and low for just the right cake topper and found it.  A women dragging her groom away from hunting to get married.  Well, my sis took this theme a step further and made a grooms cake.  (sorry, more food porn)

Even the lantern turned on!!!  She did a great job and EVERYONE was tore up over this truck.

Oh what a WONDERFUL day!!!

 So, yesterday we went to hubbies great nieces b-day party ...she was 7.  My sister in law saw me and said, "wow, I can tell you are losing.  You could just about do this and not get surgery."  Well, I have pondered this to be ready for when folks say that, because I knew it was coming. (she was not being ugly by all means).  I said, "the only reason I am being so faithful on this diet is because I am getting the surgery and I don't want to screw this up.  I want everything to be just right when I get it.  If I was doing this just to lose weight, then 'you see that cake over there', I would already be eating a big ole piece."
I now see why so many people question, "can I do this on my own?", even though they tried in the past.  I had to face the reality that I HAVE tried this on my own and it didn't last.  Therefore, I am getting this tool to assist me.  And I cannot wait!!!!  I already have my pre-op or post-op diets laid out for Thanksgiving.  :)

Yes, Yes, Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I couldn't stand the suspense any longer, so I called my insurance and they said "YES".  whewwwwwwwwww
Now waiting for the surgeons office to call with an appointment. 

Weighdnesday

Well, I lost another pound on the pre-op diet, for my new weight of 243.8.  It is nice to be losing something, but I know the only reason I am so faithful on this is for the band.  I don't want to screw ANYTHING up on this.  My husband asked me the other day if I had weighed lately.  Said it looked like I had lost some in my stomach.  I thanked him and he said (this is our normal convo), "most women would have cussed me out right then."  ha ha, I am one of those people that looks NOT at what was said, but who it is coming from and where they are coming from.  He was paying me a compliment.  He tickles me though because he tries not to say the wrong thing, forgetting I am one of those people that views things differently.  Then I get to laugh at him panicing, thinking I am gonna be made at him.  :)  LOVE him.

Still waiting for THE call.  ugh, this waiting is a killin' me!!!  I am trying to focus on other things.  It will be when it will be....nothing I can do about it.....but I am still anxious.  :)

Feel like a kid a week before Christmas

Insurance has my paperwork and are reviewing it.  Praying for a speedy approval.

So, for the record, I do feel like a kid before Christmas.  I am so anxious and excited that I am about to go nuts.  ha ha  I am just a little insane. ;)

Waiting, weigh-ins and Names



My waiting game has truly begun.  I am trying to not stress.  I did my part, now we have to see if the insurance accepts it all.  Don’t you just love the waiting game and the not knowing.

I am on day three of the low carb diet.  All is well so far.  I did find myself wanting a bowl of cereal last night, so I had sugar free gelatin instead.  Thankfully it worked.  I do NOT want to screw this up.  This has been a long 5 months and I don’t want to mess it up for anything.  I have done a little walking and will increase that.  The surgeon said it will be easier to do after surgery if I get my body used to it now.  I have already made a lot of changes needed for the band and am working on the not drinking during meals and the chewing….a bazillion times.    J

For some reason, I have decided that Wednesday will be my weigh day.  I just like the mid week thing for some reason.  Well, I weighed this morning and it was 244.8, so my 2 days of low carbs is helping.   I also need to get my husband to help me gets some pictures and measurements together.  Oh joy!!!  (NOT)  One day I will look back at them and be glad I put together my starting photos.

I am stealing an idea from several of you.  First, my band will have her own birthday (yes, she is a girl) and her name will be Desiree.  I chose that name because in French it means “much desired”.  I desire to be healthy, to feel good, to not hate what I see in the mirror, to wear nice cloths, to enjoy shopping, to have some energy, to be able to move and not feel like I am moving thru mud (I hate that) and the list goes on.  So there you have it, her name will be Desiree and hopefully we will know her birth date soon.

Paper work headed to insurance on Monday

Well, I went to the surgeon today with my husband as my support.  We went over everything and the paperwork is being faxed to insurance on Monday!!!!  They told me that they have good results with my insurance and usually hear something within 72 hrs, so they expect to know something by the end of next week.  They will then schedule my surgery.  Looks like I will be a November Bandster!!!  They told me I am to start the low carb diet on Monday so I will be ready.  Also, I found out that I get to go straight to mushies after surgery.  Yeah............so, hmmm, what shall I eat for Thanksgiving. 

I was feeling a little crabby on my birthday.  ha ha ha, Just kidding.  I felt pretty good.  Had some family in and we went to an aquarium. My husband couldn't resist getting this picture.

Well, time is moving nicely and I am so ready for my visit with the surgeon on Friday the 21st.  I am ready to get this show on the road.  :)

Last week I took some time to read some more blogs.  I am going to expound on what I said last time about the blogs of folks that have already gone thru the journey.  Something I have noticed about reading them is that in the beginning, they HAD all the fears I have now.  Can I do this?  Will I fail at this too?  Will my insurance give me the thumbs up?  And then as I read each blog, the days go by, the months go by and I watch as they come to the realization of, "Yes, I AM doing this!  I CAN succeed.  I do have to put forth the effort, but with the help of the band, I can achieve my dreams."  Reading these blogs has been like reading a book.  The baseline story, the issues, the climax and then achieving the goal, only to make new goals and to live life.  Oh how exciting.  I got so into a blog the other day that something negative happened and I was heart broken.  I'm so crazy.  My point is, all your blogs are helping me see that I will get over those feelings and over any hurdles.

My husband expressed concern over me losing so much that I will look sickly (ha ha, I can't say I have ever had anyone worry like that over me before...well, not for that reason.)  I think he see's all my determination and doesn't want me to get crazy................well, crazier.  :)  I told him, I just want to be comfortable.  He looked at me like he wasn't sure what I meant.  I said, you know that poofy hunting coat you hate because you look like Randy in Christmas Story....."I can't put my arms down..."  He said yes and I said, that is how I feel all the time.  I saw the light bulb come on over his head.  I just want to be comfortable.  Not Twiggy (or what ever her name was).

To my followers.....

I just wanted to take a moment to say thank you so much for all of your words of encouragement on this journey. I have 9 followers, 2 of them are 2 of my sisters and the others are my new friends.  I am not even banded yet and yet I feel like I am already a part of the Band-it family.

I have read numourous blogs of those that have been on this journey for a while and am so encouraged to read all that they learned.  It is like reading a good book......I just can't put my computer down.  Some folks are addicted to farmville and I am addicted to blogs.  :)  One of the great things about reading these blogs after the fact is to watch how you each grow....small in size, but big in lessons.  I love seeing when everything finally comes together and each are learning your band and learning how to make it work for you.

When I go to the surgeon on the 21st, I have to have someone from my support team with me....my husband.  But I will not hesitate to tell the doc about all of you and the folks at work.  I am completely amazed by the support.  Thank you again!!!!

The most wonderful time of the year....Autumn

I LOVE Fall!!!!  I could soooo see myself sitting by this tree with a good book.

It seems approriate, if you will, that I am being banded in the fall.  I love everything about this time of year.  The crisp air, the colors.  I am not a summer lover....never have been.  I feel alive this time of year.  One of my friends said (pardon me if I repeat myself from a previous post), that I will probably be banded right before Thanksgiving.  I said, well then, I will enjoy myself a steaming bowl of Turkey broth and a pumpkin spiced protein shake.  :)  That is me being positive.

I am using this time to reflect.  I have notice on lap band talk and other blogs that that is what most folks do during this waiting period.  One of the main things I have been reflecting on this week are the things I am looking forward to.  I have seen many folks list some of these, so here is a start on my list.

More energy (I am tired of having zero energy)

Get to the top of the stairs and not be doubled over.

Purchase AND wear pretty cloths.

To feel more comfortable.

To look comfortable (and not all squishy)

Get off blood pressure meds.

Delay the onset of other health issues.

This is just a start to the list.  I will add more as they come. :)

Stressful week.....

This resembled me this week.  Well, especially Thursday night.  I lost my mind (well, what was left of it).

First, my surgeon is going on vacation.....for 3 weeks.  ugh!!!  So it will be Oct. 21 before I see him and THEN they can submit everything to the insurance.  So it could be another 3 weeks after that and what if they disapprove it.  So it will probably be more then 6 weeks PLUS there is Thanksgiving, so no surgeries that week probably.  Needless to say, I am annoyed.  I was hoping he would have a cancellation before he went on vacation so we could get the paperwork to the insurance company, but oh well, it is not my time.

I am a passive person.  I RUN from any confrontations or any situation that could be sticky.  I don't handle stuff like that well at all.  Ok, so with the stress of everything this week, I found myself trying to figure some things out and I lost my mind.  At one point I resembled the girl from the Exorcist.  I really believe my head spun around.  I was having a battle with myself and neither one won.  Ugh!!!

I am still fighting with myself, but trying to do it in a positive way (which is more my nature).  One, I am trying to learn how to face things head on instead of running from them (soooo much easier said then done....for me).  This morning, I decided to take a little out on the treadmill and walked for an hour while watching the Biggest Loser.  I do feel better.  Now to just approach my difficulties and take my stress out on the treadmill from now on...then maybe my husband won't be so skeered.  :)

Support

I am beginning to realize the importance of a good support system.  I know the staff at my doctor’s office are adamant about us having a good support system at home and hopefully in life as well.

I was conversing with one of my sisters yesterday.  She is trying so hard to quit smoking and she made it 10 days.  I am so proud of her.  I noted several things about our conversation.  One, she acknowledged that she smoked more then she led everyone to believe.  Wow, that was huge, because she was being honest with herself.  Another was when she said how much she needed to hear her sisters say, “I am proud of you.”  She knows we are and we tell her often, but she realizes how much she needs that support system.  She knows it is vital to her success.  Oh, and another thing she pointed out was that she has realized that her desire for a cigarette is temporary, not all day.  I told her that it was such a part of her routine that she is feeling that change at times and she will need to work towards developing new routines.

I realized our journeys are quite similar.  We are both making life changes that will affect our health and the rest of our lives.  Just the other day I decided it is time to ditch the carbs.  Well, the bad carbs that is.   I have been going thru my own DT’s, but I know I will feel better in the long run.  Heck, it has paid off in a few more lbs lost.  Yeah Me!!!  But back to the support, thanks to my sisters excitement for her own milestone, it helped me fight thru mine yesterday.  I wanted to eat something not so good for me, but I fought thru it because she gave me that boost I needed (and she doesn’t even know it).

I am blessed to have an awesome support system.  My sisters are my cheerleaders.  They keep encouraging me on this journey and like my other sister, that support helps me thru the next hurdle.  My husband as well as other family and friends are there for me in whatever endeavors I take and the monthly support group as well as lapbandtalk.com and this blog have been amazing.  I am learning so much from others.

(P.S. I weighed this morning and it was 245.2.  I can't seem to update my weight loss ticker.  ugh)

Another sunday in the south

This Sunday is a far cry better then last Sunday.  Irene came for a very unwelcomed visit.  We were very fortunate, but my step daughters car was flooded and some friends house was flooded.  We were without power from Saturday around 4 am till Friday around 3 pm.  Those first days were tough.....it was so hot and the air was still.  All you could here were generators throughout the neighborhood.  I was thanking God for the nights that got down to the mid 60's.  Now, just praying that the new storm coming avoids us.

Well, I have 8 more days till my final check mark.  My husband asked last night when my surgery will be.  I tried to explain the process and just managed to confuse him all the more.  I said, I would say mid October. :)  I was reading some comments on www.lapbandtalk.com and some were saying that the surgeons give them a tentative date while they wait for the thumbs up from the insurance company.  I hope so....I am so excited.  I have been struggling and I am so ready for this.  And I am so discussed with myself.  And I found a new fat role the other day.  grrrr  I didn't realize the fat was hanging down on my back.  NOT happy about that at all.  ok, enough on my pity party.

Earthquakes and hurricanes.....hmmmm

Well, we started the week off with an earthquake and are ending it with a hurricane.  Oh my!!  We are running out in the morning to get a few more supplies and then will wait the storm out.

I had my endoscopy appointment yesterday.  My husband decided that he does NOT like me on anesthesia.  ha ha, he likes getting a response from me when he is cutting up and picking on me. Under the influence, I just stared at him.  lol  I think he was hoping to have some new things to pick on me about.
Well, the visit went well.  Doc said I had a small hiatel hernia, but nothing to worry about.  Whew!!!  Come on Sept. 12.  My last check mark and then we can get this show on the road.

Well, keep us southern folks in your prayers as we try to ride out this hurricane.

WOW!!!!  What a busy summer it has been.  Time is flying by and I for one am glad.  I am so ready for my surgery and I am trying to be patient.

Well, some friends and I jetted off to Maine for a long weekend to see some friends.  I was quite nervous about the flight, not for fear of flying, but of the seatbelt.  My friends assured me that the seat belt would fit. Each plane we got on was different.  The first one didn't have much left and then the next one I could barely fasten.  Coming back it was pretty much the same until that last plane.  I really thought I was going to have to ask for an extender.  I sucked it all in and finally got it to click.  Whew!  I thought, I hate this, I don't like not being "normal".  (ha ha, my husband would say, "you will never be normal" he would be speaking mentally lol) I am so looking forward to getting on a plane in the future and listing it as a NSV (non surgery victory).

I go this coming Wednesday for my endoscopy.  I am excited for that (I know, that is weird).  I am excited because it is another check mark towards submitting all this data to the insurance.  Last thing is a doc visit on Sept. 12th and then all the paper work gets sent to the insurance.  Then the waiting will begin.

I went to another support group this past Monday.  Had a great time and am learning so much.  The staff from my doctor's office are so awesome and encouraging.  Ha ha, they made one lady spit her gum out.  I felt like I was in school again.  They said my surgeon had to do emergency surgery this past week because a lady was chewing gum, stumbled and swallowed it.  She couldn't get it up or down.
Speaking of that...I have given up soda, gun and straws.  Woo Hoo!!

Fightin' tools

I can remember as a child, my father asking for fightin' tools.  He was referring to fork, spoon and knife. :) 
Well, the psychiatrist told me to get smaller utensils and child's divided plate.  I am trying to keep this fun, as you can see in the photo.  The best find yet are the forks.  I didn't just want a child's set.  Then I discovered these cake forks.  Yes, that is what I said, cake forks.  Now WHO eats cake with a little fork (besides bansters that is)  I have never heard of them.  I have heard of a salad fork, but never a cake fork.

All I know, is they are so cute and I am tickled to death with them.

Baby steps

A concept I am trying to learn.

I have this mind set that if you are going to do something, then go all the way.  This isn't always possible, which is why I give up so often.

Exercise being one of them.  I either go full force, just about killing myself, or none at all.  My nutritionist told me, "little steps".  "10 minutes a day is all I ask in the beginning".  I can't seem to wrap my mind around that.  I hear others say, "Ah, 10 minutes, that isn't gonna do a thing for you!"  And I listen to them!  I wasn't getting the picture that the 10 minutes was to work on getting me up to 15 mins...then 20 and so forth.  (whew, I'm bright) lol

So today I started this new regiment.   First, it's hotter then 40 hells here in the south.  Walking around outside right now is out of the question.   I am sure I would resemble Scarlett O'hara after working in the field.  Not a good image (or smell) for my work environment.  So I had another one of my brilliant ideas. :) We have 3 stairs cases in our building.  One on each end and then one center way.  Soooo, I go down stair case 1 on one end, up stair case 2 on the other end, down the middle case, up stair case 1, down stair case 2 and back up the middle case.  :)  Took a little less then 10 mins.  We have two 15 min breaks a day, so I am going to do this on each break.  It was tough today.....whew.  (and I have only done the rounds once today....ha ha)  I figure as I can speed up, I might go for 2 rounds on each break.

Sunday in the south

Ah, all is quiet.  Just me and the cat this morning (and a cup of coffee of course).  This is my quiet time.  Preparing breakfast for my family before we head to church.

I am also taking the time to sample some samples the nutritionist gave me.  So far, I liked the Unjury chocolate splendor.  It was fine with skim milk and then I upped the taste by adding a little ice and tablespoon of peanut butter.  mmmmm, it was quite tasty.  I tried a Muscle Milk protein bar recently and it was a big NEGATIVE.  whew, it turned my stomach against me. I was able to pick up some Muscle Milk protein drinks at a discount store.  Whew, now I know why they were at the discount store.  OMG, whew.  Not sure what I could do to disguise the taste of the protein.

I just tried a Calcet Lemon bite and it was quite tasty.  I think it might be rather pricey too.  I think I will get the chocolate bites from my local pharmacy.  I think it is a month and a half worth for $10.  Also, I just tried a Celebrate chewable multi-vitamin.  Not too bad.  A little tangy.  I need to check the prices there as well. I saw that Centrum has a chewable and I wish I could get a hold of a sample of that to try.  I hate to buy a bottle of 90 only to find out I can't stomach them.

While at the discount store, I also found some soups and broth for a good price (I pray they taste ok.  I better have some back ups just in case.)  Here is a pic of a few items.

Not sure how they will taste, but I am thinking I can doctor them up.....hopefully.

I have a sample of Unjury Chicken soup that I haven't tried.  While the above soups only have like 2 or 4 grams of protein, the Unjury soup has 21.  I wonder if I can mix the Unjury with some of the above. hmmmm

Well, off to have breakfast and get ready for church.

Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!

Well, on my doctor supervised diet, I have managed to gain 3 lbs.  Hmmmm, you think I NEED the lap band.  Whew.  My husband said, "if you lose weight on the lap band as quick as you gain weight normally, then you will do quite well."  ha ha, that I would.  It is true though, I can gain weight so very easy.  It's pretty crazy.

I told the doc I will try to get more structured exercise and eat lots from our garden (hubby brought in a PILE of cucumbers...yeah!!!) 

2 more months and I get to submit it all to the insurance company.  Oh, time, please fly by. :)

Mirror mirror on the wall, who's the largest one of all OR a pictures worth a 1000 lbs.

Typical to anyone getting the band, doubts run thru your mind.  Can I do it on my own? I did it in my 20's. Should I do this?  The answer is a resounding YES.   I take time to reflect on all my MANY attempts at weight loss over the past years and know that I need this tool to help me on this journey.

I had the pleasure of visiting family in Delaware this past week and now have some family visiting me from Alaska and Delaware.  We ventured off to see an old Civil War fort and when I looked at the picture of myself, I was at a loss for words.  Why is it, I see one thing in the mirror and another in pictures.  This picture will help to keep me grounded in my decision to get the band.

(oh, and I do have two legs.)  :)

This picture definitly opened my eyes.

As I mentioned, I was able to visit family.  I had told two of my sisters and was taking this time to share my news with the other.  I explained the procedure to her to eliminate any fears she may have.  She saw my excitement and was on board immediately. Also, my oldest sister shared my news with her children (grown children).  My niece wrote me the sweetest letter telling me how proud she is of me and how not to look at this as a failure or weakness (as many view it), but as success and strength.  Needless to say, I cried.  Oh how blessed I am to have this support group.  My cup overruneth. :)

I want my band and I want it now!

Funny how firm I can be on the computer and such a push over in real life.

I am currently doing my 3 month, doctor supervised diet and exercise. (insurance required) Ugh!  The good thing, I have a constant reminder of why I am choosing to get the band.  I am HUNGRY!!!  I try to do all the right things I know I should, but I am hungry.  I am one of the lucky people.  I like meat, I like veggies and I even like water.  I just get hungry and want to eat the cow in the field down the road.

I continue to read all the success stories for inspiration and try to hold on till that glorious day.  (the cow thanks you)



I am continuing to practice eating slowly and chew chew chew (ha ha, kind of like that cow).  I am also still practicing to eat without drinking.  Sometimes I still take a sip.

A friend of mine got her lap band several years ago.  She has struggled with several things, one being she wasn't hungry.  (Sounds like a good thing to me, but ok)  Anyhow, because she has issues with her blood sugar, she HAD to eat.  Well, I shared some of the info the nutritionist gave me and she found out one of her problems.  "They" told her that you won't be able to drink soda's!  She was like, well, guess what kimosabe, I CAN drink them, so HA!  Well, when I sent her the info, she read where the soda (carbonation) triggers the brain to think you are full and also stretches the pouch.  ahhhhh  So, since she has stopped drinking them, she has been able to eat properly (for a banster that is).

I am learning so much and getting more excited!

Successful bandits

In all my research about the band (reading blogs and forums), I have learned that there are several commonalities amongst successful bandits (or banders or banditos...ha ha, I love all the play on words)

Attitude.  From what I have seen, the folks who have had a good, positive and strong attitude have been successful, whereas the folks that seem to have self-pity or just a plain poor or negative attitude have struggled a whole lot more.  Don't get me know, I realize everyones journey is different and folks have different issues.  Some can eat this, but some can't and so forth.  But the folks with a good attitude seem to have had a better fighting chance.
They were well aware of the changes they would have to make and for the most part, followed thru. They still had lessons to learn, but maintained that positive outlook.

Successful banders see the band as the tool it is meant to be.  They do not see the band as a quick fix.  They learn to use the band to their advantage.

And they prepare themselves.  They arm themselves with the foods they can eat.  Use smaller plates and utensils and search out good recipes.  They read forums and blogs of other successful banders for inspiration and to help keep the focus.

I am making preparations to be ready, mentally and physically.

Best wishes to my fellow newbies.

Goals

I haven't really broached the subject of goals.  The obvious first would be, to look good.  :)  Isn't that what we all want.....deep down.  Actually, I am tired of being tired.  I am tired of feeling like I am moving thru mud just to get from my car to my desk each morning.  And I want to wear cute clothes....well, a 40 year old cute clothes.  (not fond of 40 somethings wearing teens clothes, but that is just me)  I was walking thru a store after my psych visit and looking at the plus size clothes.  They reminded me of the polyester shirts my mother wore in the 70's.  In bright color, bold patterns screaming, "LOOK AT ME, HERE I COME!"  Yeah, just what I want to do.  Sorry, but that is not my cup of tea.  I want to look comfortable.  I want to look relaxed.  Do you know what I mean?  Where your cloths fit nicely and you look comfortable.  I want to fit on a roller coaster again.  I want to have the energy to do things I enjoy.  I want to fit back into my reenacting clothes.

I saw these really cute slacks a few years ago.  I didn't buy them, but I was crazy over them.  Well, I went into the store several months later and they had them for $7.  They only had a 16 and I like how I look at that size, so I bought them.  They are hanging in the closet, just waiting for me.  They are dark blue, with light pin strips and red buttons.  I thought a red tank and white 3/4 sleeve blouse over it would look good.  That is another goal.  I want to wear that outfit.  I promise, the day I do, I will post the pictures.  I am in between a 22 and 24.  Actually, those are tight.  I got so disgusted that I ended up buying men's t-shirts recently.

I was fired up today about recipes. I got the idea to check Campbell's website for meal ideas using their healthy request soups.  I got several promising ones.  I always hear that if meat is dry, it is more apt to get stuck, so I thought this might be a good way to keep it moist.  I also had the idea that if my husband cooks on the grill and it is too dry, maybe I can mix the meat with a little broth and mix it in this little blender.  hmmmm, we shall see.

Let me know of any ideas you might have.

To tell, or not to tell......that is the question:

(Please don't tell Shakespeare I stole his format)
  I have seen this subject countless times in both forums and blogs.  I am taking the lesson's learned by other banders and attempting to only tell those that will support and encourage me.  It still leaves me in a bit of a possible sticky situation.
  Here is the deal.  First, I told my husband, son and step-daughter.  My husband was and has always been supportive.  My son was like, ok (translation:  What ever, your grown, do what you want...ha ha, I love that boy!)  My step-daughter was the only one that struggled with it.  She showed her concern and I explained it to her.  She was more at ease, but still does not understand because, "Miss Joyce, you look just fine."  Awww, love her.  She doesn't fully grasp my fears of future health problems.  I have been so fortunate so far, but for how long?  My poor siblings are having a time with their health.
  I then mentioned it to my two closest friends.  I told them for a couple of reasons.  One, if they found out later, they would have been hurt and two, they are banded, so they would have known.  :)  They have had such a devil of a time with their bands and would rather I didn't, but they know I made my mind up.  I told one just this morning, "I am going into this with my eyes wide open.  I realize the issues I will and may endure and I am still taking this journey."

  I am the baby of 7.  Cold winters in Delaware.....most of us were born in Sept and Oct. ;)  I was talking to my oldest sister the other day.  All of my siblings have always worried about my weight.  Anyhow, we were talking and in an effort to reassure her that I was taking some action, I told her I was talking to a nutritionist and my doctor.  She then says, "Have you thought about the Lap Band?"  I busted out laughing.  Well sis, since you mentioned it, yeah, that's what I am doing.  I thought she was gonna cry.....happy cry.  So now she is fired up looking for protein high, band friendly meals for me.  Woo Hoo!!!
  I am considering telling my other sisters, but I am nervous.  Again, they will probably find out one day and they would be hurt if I didn't.  So I am thinking of telling them.  Wish me luck.

Let's get this party started...part deux

( I am trying not to overwhelm anyone with one huge blog, so I am breaking this first one down)
  So, I went to the seminar and tried to absorb as much info as I could and asked many questions.  Then called days later with more questions.  Knowledge is power!!!  My insurance requires 3mths (for doc visits) of a doctor monitored diet and exercise.  I went on June 10th to get that going.  I went today for my 6 month check on my blood pressure and was UP 2 lbs.  Oh, good grief!
  I went 2 weeks ago to meet with the nutritionist.  LOVED her!!!  One of the things I loved was not only do they say, do this, don't do that, but they tell you why.  I am more apt to obey if I know why.  She gave me a list to try and start making changes.  I am now off sodas.  Good bye Diet Mt. Dew, so long Diet Dr. Pepper.  You are no good for me, so I must sever this relationship.
  I went to a support group that is hosted by our nutritionist and it was awesome.  So much knowledge and trust me, I asked questions.  Looking forward to going thru this new journey with the new friends there.
  I took the psych eval test last week.  (my husband told me to just tell them I was crazy and get it over with. lol  He thinks it is unnatural for someone to be happy all the time.) :)   Anyhow, I met with the psychologist today and he was very please to see how much research I had done and how I am already practicing to chew and chew and chew and also not drinking during meals.
  He was quite helpful.  He gave me the idea to use a child's divided plate and to use children's utensils.  Hmmm, should I get Barbie....maybe Shrek......hey, that little monkey is kind of cute.  Will let you know later what I decide.
  With that said, I did get an idea.  I know some of this is gonna be difficult.  Especially going thru Bander Hell or what ever it is called.  I am sure I will give it a name.  Anyhow, I thought, why not get my own pretty dishes....just for me.  Something that brightens me up, makes me happy.  Heck, beats using the same old stuff.

Well, more to come as I learn more on this new journey and thank you for visiting me and please feel free to share your wealth of knowledge with this newbie.

Let's get this party started

  Well, I suppose you wouldn't call it a party, but a celebration just the same (with liquids, mushies and smaller quantities as the appetizers and meal) :)  (what, no emoticons here....if anyone knows how I can insert them, please let me know).
  About a month ago, I made the decision to go with an adjustable band.  The decision was not easy or quick.  I used to be a naysayer.  Sorry, but I was.  I have a couple of friends with the band and they have had so much trouble for various reasons.  I wanted no part of it.
  Then one day, I was talking to a co-worker who was banded 2 years ago.  She said, Joyce, I was over 300 lbs.  I knew what I needed to do, I just needed this TOOL to help me.  BAMM!!!  No, that is not Emeril in the kitchen.  That was the light bulb smacking me in the head.  TOOL!!!  I never looked at it like that.  If used properly, this tool can help me achieve my goals.
  Once that hit me, I researched and researched and researched some more.  Then I called Southern Surgical in Greenville and got the ball rolling.

A little more about me

My name is Joyce and I am 45, married with a 19 yr old son and 18 yr old step-daughter.  I have battled with my weight since I was 14.  I met my best friend, "Food", in junior high.  I was extremely shy growing up, so I was "that girl".  You remember the one.  The one the school took great pleasure in teasing.  So when I got home each day, my "dear friend" was there to comfort me.
  As a result, I gained weight and was teased all the more.  Oh what a vicious circle.
  We moved from Delaware to North Carolina when I was 15.  I was 5'2" and 185lbs at the time.  I was excited about the move, thinking I would leave my nemesis behind me.  I didn't realize there were nemesis everywhere, so the teasing continued.
  Soon after this, my mother became very ill.  The doctors discovered she had a bad heart with 14 yrs of damage.  I spent that summer taking care of her.  I turned 16 that fall and with that, new changes.  My self-esteem was at its lowest, on top of all the normal teenage issues.  I decided to change and lost weight over the next summer.
  I maintained and met my husband at 18, married at 19 and my mother passed when I was 20.  My heart was broken and my old friend, Food, returned to comfort me.  I can remember that day so well, I ate so much I thought I would be sick.
  A few years later, in my mid 20's, I decided once again to make changes.  I hardly ate, or the right things.  I was never in danger of anorexia, but I still wasn't healthy.  I was about 127lbs when I was 25.  I was happy and all was well in the world.
  Then we tried to have a baby.  I had a couple of miscarriages and turned to my old friend again.  I had gained roughly 35lbs by the time I was pregnant with my son.  After having him, I lost a little, but with all the changes I couldn't seem to focus on me.  (part of that is my co-dependent nature...more on that later).  My weight crept up and in 5 years was 260 plus.  I stopped weighing myself, but I know it was over 260.  My self-esteem was once again rock bottom and in the next 4 yrs my husband and I were divorcing.  I couldn't eat and got down to about 179lbs that next year.
  Unfortunately, I did the dreaded "rebound".  I married 3 weeks after my divorce to a man I barely knew.  ( WHAT was I thinking?!?!?!?)  Soon after I realized he was an alcoholic.  This is how I came to learn I was co-dependant.  For 4 1/2 years, I endured his drunken state.  I was on the verge of insanity, literally.  I asked the doctor for something to help and he gave me some samples.  I put them in my dresser drawer and would periodically look at them, then put them back in.  Finally I pulled them out and said, "I can take these and mask the problem, OR, do something about the problem".  3 weeks later we split.  I CANNOT put into words the shear relief I felt.  By this point, I was 260 plus again.
  I took a WELL needed sabbatical and focused on my son as well as myself.  He was 14 and I was 40.  I had a hysterectomy that August and decided to use that to help me lose weight again.  I tried to eat smaller portions and with the relief of being out of that situation, it came a little easier.  I got down to 202lbs.  Once again it crept up about 20lbs when I met my current husband.  He is awesome and I am so beyond thankful to have him in my life.  I took my time and he was well worth the wait.  We were married this past November.  I was about 235lbs and have since gained to 248.

This is me at our wedding.  I decided to use a full length for better comparisons in the future.

  So, here we are.....